Akinpelumi Dare Charles

Allow Your Own Inner Light to Guide You
There comes a time when you must stand alone.

You must feel confident enough within yourself to follow your own dreams.

You must be willing to make sacrifices.

You must be capable of changing and rearranging your priorities so that your final goal can be achieved.

Sometimes, familiarity and comfort need to be challenged.

There are times when you must take a few extra chances and create your own realities.

Be strong enough to at least try to make your life better.

Be confident enough that you won't settle for a compromise just to get by.

Appreciate yourself by allowing yourself the opportunities to grow, develop, and find your true sense of purpose in this life.

Don't stand in someone else's shadow when it's your sunlight that should lead the way.

Work hard at what you like to do and try to overcome all obstacles

Laugh at your mistakes and praise yourself for learning from them

Pick some flowers and appreciate the beauty of nature

Say hello to strangers and enjoy the people you know

Don't be afraid to show your emotions laughing and crying make you feel better

Love your friends and family with your entire being they are the most important part of your life

Feel the calmness on a quiet sunny day

Find a rainbow and live your world of dreams always remember life is better than it seems


BE THANKFUL
Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire. If you did, what would there be to look forward to?
Be thankful when you don't know something, for it gives you the opportunity to learn.
Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations, because they give you opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you're tired and weary, because it means you've made a difference.
It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings.

Appreciating Our Past
It is easy to be negative about past mistakes and unhappiness. But it is much more healing to look at ourselves and our past in the light of experience, acceptance, and growth.
Our past is a series of lessons that advance us to higher levels of living and loving. The relationships we entered, stayed in, or ended taught us necessary lessons.
Some of us have emerged from the most painful circumstances with strong insights about who we are and what we want. Our mistakes? Necessary. Our frustrations, failures, and sometimes stumbling attempts at growth and progress? Necessary too. Each step of the way, we learned. We went through exactly the experiences we need to, to become who we are today. Each step of the way, we progressed. Is our past a mistake? No. The only mistake we can make is mistaking that for the truth.
Today, God, help me let go of negative thoughts I may be harboring about my past circumstances or relationships. I can accept, with gratitude, all that has brought me to today.

A Lesson in Life
Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, if they be events, illnesses or relationships, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere.
If someone hurts you, betrays you , or breaks you heart, forgive them. For they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to who you open your heart to.
If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are teaching you to love and opening your heart and eyes to things you would have never seen or felt without them.
Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again.
Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you either.
You can make of your life anything you wish. Create your own life and then go out and live it.

Good Questions Good Answers

1. Where are you now? Assess relationship bonds and entanglements
2. What are your life goals? Identify your life goals ... and what blocks you
3. How to reach your goals? Use your conscious and unconscious resources
4. What stops you? Dissolve abuse and trauma to rebuild motivation
5. What else stops you? Change your limiting beliefs to end dependence
6. What else stops you? Resolve identity loss to recover qualities and skills
7. What else stops you? Heal mentor damage and find quality mentor ship
8. What about your partnership? Build happy partnership (or separate peacefully)
9. What about your children? We coach parents to resolve family problems
10. What about your success? We coach team leaders and teams ... together
11. What about your community? We coach community leaders and communities
12. What about complex goals? Specialty coaching & training for unusual goals Specialty

• be alone with yourself often. Spend some quality time having deep thoughts in order to identify with yourself, who you are, what you desire and more importantly what makes you happy. You may be the person that needs to be happy again especially if you are dealing with a mid-life crisis.
• Take the control back. Influence yourself instead of allowing others to influence you. After all, how can you identify with yourself when you are allowing others to create your identity for you by putting their advice above your own. Your desires should be the most important of all.

• Think about the things you enjoy doing and then do them. I can not think of a better way to find your identity or avoid a mid-life crisis than by being you and doing the things that you love most.




Solutions for Identity Issues

Few people are trained by their parents on how to show or express emotions. Later in life, our competitive societies often insist that people ignore or deny their emotions. Many people are encouraged to not-feel! If you ask people how they feel - the most common answer is "Not bad".

Ask a man what he feels and he will tell you what he thinks.
Ask a woman what she thinks and you may hear how she feels.

Some people seem exceptionally dissociated from their own feelings. They may seem normal, and are often intelligent, yet they seem insincere, shallow and dry to people who enjoy talking about feelings. Dissociated people may say that they feel empty - but under the emptiness are often layers of grief, fear, anger, boredom and unworthiness.

Probing this emptiness can disturb people who prefer to avoid their feelings - which they may call irrational, stupid and childish. But if some crisis, real or imagined, precipitates an emotional explosion, then their next step may be to seek drugs or psychiatric medication. What else can they do?

We help dissociated people regain access to their feelings and to their identity. We are careful about coaching people with these symptoms as this often means exploring disturbing emotions. This coaching is for basically healthy and motivated people who want to feel as well as think.
Identity Loss, Dissociation & Dissociative Disorders

Most children who are punished for expressing their feelings of anger, sadness and anxiety learn to hide, bury or dissociate their feelings. When these emotions return - triggered by some event - the emotions are unlikely to be appropriate for the current, changed environment. The expression of buried emotions may be called emotional disorders, personality disorders or psychosomatic symptoms.

If dissociated emotions remain dissociated, this loss of personal identity may impair relationships, inhibit memory and limit flexibility. Dissociative disorder refers to behavior patterns typical of people who repress unpleasant emotions that are associated with traumatic or abusive memories and relationships.

Few people with identity loss or dissociative disorders can define their goals; and endless encouragement or goalwork may not help them. The best goals they can provide may be abstract or incongruent (often stated as abstract complaints e.g. I don't want to feel so empty all the time!

[Include some basic psychobiology of cerebral cortex - hind-brain communication].
People who sabotage their own goals

For us, identity loss refers to a loss of self. Many people, following trauma, abuse, membership in cult-like organizations, or therapy damage, appear to lose access to some of their human qualities. These qualities may be replaced with unpleasant emotional reactions, compulsive behavior and confusing communication. People with identity loss rarely express many emotions nor much personality.

I felt hollow, like I was disappearing. The only thing that gave me comfort was sleep. I wanted me back. Nothing gave me real pleasure. I just wanted to sleep and cry ... and then our wonderful sessions ... now I am back Miami, USA

Extreme cases of identity loss may be called nervous breakdown or emotional breakdown. Many people become frustrated, angry and anxious, and later dull and empty, devoid of anything except irritation and boredom. A rich sense of life may be replaced by a need for distraction.

I used to be full of life and had lots of energy, but since my divorce I feel totally empty ... I am 41 ... I am diagnosed with chronic fatigue ... but it's more like a huge part of me is missing.
All I do is watch television. When can we start? Leeds, UK

Some common symptoms that we help people resolve are:

1. Expresses few goals and little sense of self
2. Cannot describe feelings or express own values
3. Feels unpleasantly bonded to someone, yet cannot leave
4. Shows obsessions, compulsions and strong limiting beliefs
5. Goals swing between two extremes (may be diagnosed as bipolar)
6. Attempts to live someone else's life, showing chronic irrational emotions

Many people experience these common symptoms sometimes. If the lost qualities represent a significant portion of a person's identity, the symptoms of identity loss become easier to recognize.

People may lose access to some of their human qualities during or following trauma, abuse, therapist damage or membership in cult-like organizations. This loss of self may accompany or follow stress or distress at home or at work. Depression is common if life lacks sense.

We describe Identity Loss as an inability to access emotions and qualities that are central to a sense of self and sense of life. This loss often follows abuse or relationship distress and manifests as chronic dissociation or the chronic expression of inappropriate emotions.

A few people become desperate, and may harm themselves or others. Such people may feel armored, invulnerable and emotionless. They are unsuitable for Skype coaching and should seek local agencies.

Sometimes a search for sense of life is replaced by fantasies. Many people try to lose themselves in movies, video games, esoteric paths or sporting events. Living life is replaced by distractions.

We help motivated adults recognize, resolve and prevent identity loss,
and find solutions for chronic anger,chronic sadness and chronic anxiety.

Dissociation & New Age Techniques

Dissociating is easy. Many so-called therapies and New Age techniques specialize in dissociation. Have you been advised to clear your emotions, to throw away your self-talk, to destroy your ego, to leave your intellect behind you? Have you been advised to ask some deity or esoteric entity to take your thoughts or feelings away? The consequences of such cures can be worse than the symptoms ...

Dissociation is simple - but the consequences often include a loss of identity. Repeated dissociation may result in long-term identity loss; which is often followed by addictive and obsessive behavior, and membership in cult-like organizations, as people strive to feel human and connected again.

We help motivated adults recognize, resolve and prevent identity loss; and find lasting solutions. We help people find themselves again. We help people learn from their past to create a future. We coach people to resolve emotions - and clarify the relationships in which those emotions were created.

Recovering identity loss includes recovering your feelings and emotions that were dissociated during stress or suggestion. As you accept and resolve your unpleasant feelings, all your emotions become wonderful resources for your integrated personality.
For us, there's no such thing as a bad feeling or a negative emotion!

Part 2: Solutions for Identity Issues
Resolve Identity Loss
We help motivated adults resolve identity loss. We coach people to dissolve the original stress or abuse and recover the unpleasant emotions that were denied, hidden or split off. We help people explore and change these unpleasant feelings and emotions to become wonderful life resources.

If you are wanting to learn more about you, and find answers to the many questions that you have within you, here you will receive the answers and guidance to help you along on your own dream quest.
Whether it be through dream interpretation, Shamanic Touch Healing, LaHo Chi Healing or through the intuitive reading session with Sky, here you will find what your are looking for. Skyhawk is a certified instructor for Shamanic Touch Healing as well as a intuitive and a Reiki Master/Teacher. Also, Sky has been making jewelry and other crafts, such as medicine bags, smudging fans and much more for many years. To have a look at the merchandise go to the jewelry and crafts page.
So, start on your dream quest, and find yourself.










Comprehensive Development Master Plan.
(a)
The Board of County Commissioners of Metropolitan Miami-Dade County, Florida, hereby adopts and enacts as Part I of the Comprehensive Development Master Plan the following capitalized section headings contained in the document entitled "Recommended Metropolitan Development Policies as Proposed by Metropolitan Miami-Dade County Planning Advisory Board and Metropolitan Miami-Dade County Planning Department":
I. GROWTH MANAGEMENT 
Miami-Dade County must plan for and manage its population growth in a manner compatible with preserving the natural environment, insuring the provision of services, and protecting natural and man-made amenities.
II. PROVISION OF SERVICES 
Insure that appropriate services, including energy, are coordinated with development and redevelopment, and are available to all.
III. ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION 
Achieve a harmonious relationship between man and his environment and assure for all citizens and tourists a healthy and aesthetically pleasing surrounding, and educate Miami-Dade County's residents as to their role within and relationship to the total environment.
IV. DEVELOPMENT PATTERN 
Provide the best possible distribution of land uses, by type and density, to meet the physical, social, cultural and economic needs of the present and future resident and tourist population in a manner which would maintain or improve the quality of the natural and man-made environment.
Plans for the development or redevelopment of municipalities should be consistent with the policies of the County's Comprehensive Development Master Plan. To provide adequate housing for all segments of the community, including for low and moderate income persons.
V. TRANSPORTATION 
Provide access to employment and the facilities and services of the entire metropolitan area; plan for mobility, opportunity, variety, energy conservation and minimum travel times and costs, safety, comfort and convenience while traveling; and provide for efficiency, economy and a well-balanced, integrated transportation system within Miami-Dade County without detracting from the quality of life of the community.
Public or mass transportation should be given top priority as a positive tool to support and improve the viability of the County and the region.
Provide a system of transportation facilities which will anticipate the need for the movement of people and storage of goods and vehicles.
Coordinate and integrate the County transportation facilities with surrounding activities so that these facilities contribute to the enrichment of the physical environment of Miami-Dade County.
Transportation facilities should be planned and designed to conserve energy and other natural resources and existing man-made facilities and to reduce the total need for new public investment.
Development within a reasonable radius of rapid transit terminals should be considered as having Countywide impact and managed consistent with overall Countywide goals.
VI. ECONOMIC AND SOCIAL NEEDS 
Foster that type of economic growth and institute those social programs that will improve the quality of life of all Miami-Dade County's residents.
To support and promote the cultural arts and spiritual values of our citizens.
VII. GOVERNMENTAL REGULATION 
AND ADMINISTRATION
Improve the process of evaluating development and redevelopment projects to achieve creative developments which are coordinated with services and to insure the harmonious relationship between man and his environment.
Plans made at various levels of government should be coordinated with each other and should involve citizen participation and input during the entire process.
Provide more efficient tools and systems of implementing the Comprehensive Development Master Plan.
(b)
It is hereby determined that the remaining statements of policies, goals and objectives contained on pages 1 through 27 of the document entitled "Recommended Metropolitan Development Policies as Proposed by Metropolitan Miami-Dade County Planning Advisory Board and Metropolitan Miami-Dade County Planning Department" are accepted as a guideline for further implementation by the Board of County Commissioners and all agencies of Metropolitan Miami-Dade County in the further preparation and implementation of Parts II and III of the Comprehensive Development Master Plan for Metropolitan Miami-Dade County, Florida.
(c)
It is hereby determined that all agencies of Metropolitan Miami-Dade County, Florida, shall be guided by the development policies contained in subsection (a) of this section.
(d)
The Metropolitan Miami-Dade County Planning Advisory Board and Department of Planning and Zoning are hereby instructed to further prepare and implement Parts II and III of the Comprehensive Development Master Plan for Metropolitan Miami-Dade County, Florida, in a manner consistent with the development policies contained in subsection (a) of this section. Further, in carrying out this said duty, the Planning Advisory Board and Department of Planning and Zoning shall be guided by those goals, policies and objectives referred to in subsection (b) hereo









Increasing Your Self-Awareness
How to Live Authenticity and Overcome Your Fears


Overcoming your fears will help you live authentically & increase your self-awareness. Here's why finding your identity is so difficult, & how you can live a full life!

Increasing your self-awareness is about living authentically and overcoming your fears. As a child, you may have been encouraged to conform or face the consequences! Most people conform...and lose themselves in the process.

Authentic living and self-awareness is about expressing honest thoughts, feelings, and opinions without condemning or judging others - and it's difficult! Overcoming fear is key.

Increasing your self-awareness is a journey full of failures and successes. Finding your identity is a process with no real end point. That is, you'll never be "done" because you're always growing and changing - and so are the people around you.
Why is Increasing Your Self-Awareness & Living Authentically Difficult?

You've been hurt. You've been betrayed, terrified, and even abused. Assaults are difficult to survive when they're committed by strangers - but when people who are supposed to love you, hurt you, it's even harder to bounce back. Living authentically and finding your identity involves dealing with your past and forgiving others.

You've hurt others. You've betrayed friends, partners, family; maybe you've even terrified and abused them. Everyone has hurt other people, to different degrees. These cycles of pain and destruction make it difficult to open up and trust again. Increasing your self-awareness is about facing your mistakes.
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You watch the media and see images of perfection, which doesn't encourage you to live authentically, with all your imperfections! The gorgeous models, rock singers and movie stars look flawless. Increasing your self-awareness means knowing these images of perfection are impossible to live up to. Finding your identity means letting the quest for perfection go. Authentic living isn't about being perfect.

You haven't let go of expectations of your parents, family, supervisors, professors, or mentors. You're encouraged to color between the lines, fit in, and be "big a girl/boy" - but you're not always encouraged to overcome your fears and live authentically. Then, when you're an adult you're expected to be politically correct, mature, and responsible. Finding your identity means letting go of others' expectations.

Increasing your self-awareness and living authentically is a lifelong journey of self-discovery.
Questions to Ponder When You're Increasing Your Self-Awareness:

* What makes your heart leap or your soul resonate?
* When do you feel most happy and relaxed? Finding your identity is knowing what makes you "you."
* What's the first thought or feeling that pops into your head when you encounter a song, person, memory, or experience? Finding your identity involves being self-aware.
* What's the THIRD thought or feeling when you encounter a song, person, memory, or situation? (some say that's your true self, depending on how buried your true self is and how much you've conformed).

Living Authentically Involves Negative Feelings

* When – and with whom – do you feel depressed, sad, or drained? Finding your identity involves avoiding those situations.
* When do you feel physically ill or unhealthy? Authentic living means figuring that out, and avoiding those situations.
* What meetings, visits, or events do you find yourself dragging yourself to? Increasing your self-awareness is about limiting or eliminating those circumstances.

Increasing your self-awareness and living authentically takes time, practice, and patience - but the rewards are well worth it!
Related Articles About Self-Identity and Authenticity

If you found Increasing Your Self-Awareness interesting, try:

5 Ways to Find Your True Identity
How Confidence and Self-Improvement Makes Your Life Good


Self-improvement involves finding your true identity and authentic self. These five ways to find yourself will strengthen your confidence and make your life good!

Finding your true identity and authentic self can be tricky because our culture – any culture – rewards conformity, normal behavior, and blending in with the crowd. Here are five ways to find yourself - your true identity. Self-improvement makes your life good, and more enjoyable!

Women are especially encouraged to be quiet and don't make waves. As a result, we can lose ourselves - and your self is a terrible thing to lose. Here's how to find your true identity, honor self development and strengthen your self esteem.

Finding your true identity and being yourself is the greatest gift you can give to your family, friends, and the world.
Finding Your True Identity and Authentic Self

These 5 ways to find yourself will increase your self-esteem and strengthen your confidence - because confidence and self-improvement makes your life good!

1. Listen to your gut. To find your authentic self, put other people’s expectations aside. What do you think, feel, and want? One way to find your true identity and honor self-improvement is to know you do care what people think...and listening to your gut anyway. You can care what people think and still find yourself – and be your authentic self. Listening to your gut helps with honoring your self-development, strengthening self-esteem and finding your true identity.
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2. Stay in touch with your dreams and goals. You have responsibilities to live up to, but you can still find your true identity and honor self-improvement in the pockets of time you do have. Even if you can’t actively work towards writing a book or going back to school, you can picture yourself achieving your goals some day. Visualization helps with honoring self development, strengthening self esteem and finding your true identity.

3. Express your true emotions. If you feel angry, get your anger out without burying your feelings in chocolate ice cream, cigarettes, wine, or excessive activity. If you’re sad, let yourself feel sad and cry or write in your journal instead of shopping, watching TV, and gossiping. This way to find your true identity and authentic self involves staying in touch with your true emotions. Expressing yourself will increase your self-esteem, strengthening self-confidence and reveal your authentic self.

4. Choose your activities carefully. Instead of participating in activities you feel lukewarm about or outright hate, learn to say no without feeling guilty or ashamed. To find your true identity and be your authentic self, limit your activities to things that support who you are and what you believe in. When you choose what you really want to do, you'll find your true identity, increase your self-esteem and honor your self- development. That's what self-improvement is all about!

5. Take risks. Trust yourself to reach out to others. Let yourself be vulnerable – but still keep your head on your shoulders – and don’t be afraid to make waves. Try new things, especially when you’re afraid, and find creative solutions to your problems. You’ll find your true identity, strengthen your self-esteem, and honor your self-development when you take risks.

If you found Finding Your True Identity: How Self-Improvement Makes Life Good helpful, try:

Taken from a PBS series this is the first of three tapes to come from that effort. It is simple the best compilation of thought provking and stimulating ideas on tape that I have found. I am a counselor who works with adolescents and I am always looking for some way to inspire, motivate, or encourage young adults to begin the process of self knowledge and self awarness and to see beyond themselves into the world they are about to enter as adults. So many tapes are too simplistic or too complicated but this series seem to intrigue these individuals as no other tape I have used has been able to do. It is a series that anyone from early adolescents to geriatrics will find extremely valuable and thought provoking. No schmoltzy solutions, no formulaic set answers to life--just wonderful stimulating ways to encouarage the listener to examine who they are, what they feel and where they want to go. You will listen to this series over and over and will hear something new each and every time.

Discover Your True Self


Discovering your true self is a crucial stage in your personal development
Just think of this: how well do you know your true self? And what is it exactly that you know? How many personal facts or character features do you know? What do you think of your true self? Is this the ultimate pride you’re feeling, or maybe shame or even fear? Your self-growth and the success of personal development efforts are entirely dependent on how well you know yourself and how you feel about your personality.
I hope you will forgive me for starting my entry with questions yet again. It seems to me that I quite enjoy starting some of my personal development articles this way. Probably, because no matter how much further I progress in my self-growth, I always get to some next level of self-understanding only to ask the next round of questions. It seems impossible for me to reach a point where I’m going to run out of all the questions and just sit there not knowing what should be done next, feeling that the quest for personal growth is over. I’m always full of questions. I’m always keen on learning something new. And sometimes it’s not clear at all whether it’s my questioning that makes me learn more or it’s my learning which makes me question everything.
My true what?
Yes, you’ve read it correctly. Your true self! And if you think you don’t know what I’m talking about, think again. Your true self is how you feel yourself when nobody’s watching. It is where your deepest thoughts live. It is what you ultimately think of yourself, how you treat yourself and what you fear others might see inside you. It is your most native and real personality.
Strangely enough, up until some quite recent point, I honestly believed that your true self is something you’re always aiming for as a person. It is the much better you which lives in your dreams – a successful guy or a beautiful girl which you always wish you could become one day. I thought becoming your true self is only about improving or gaining something about yourself. Turns out, I was wrong.
Your worst fears
Have you ever done something you wish no one could ever find out about? Chances are, you have. Do you still remember what exactly it was, and why you didn’t (and maybe still don’t) want anyone to find out about it?
Quite often, we do something and then try and justify our behaviour using things, events and people we see around us. A little bit less common but still very popular is to go through this process the other way around – justifying our actions, and then actually making them.
We do something only to realise how stupid it was, and this is when you can easily hear the inner voice of yours. That’s your true self talking there right now. This is the voice which, depending on your character, will either encourage you to take even more actions or discourage yourself as much as possible. This is the inner voice which easily controls a great part of your self-esteem. And like it or not, your true self is absolutely right in most cases.
So what happens then? We hear ourselves thinking about some events and we hear quite reasonable explanations inside our heads on the subject. We get to hear all the truth on the topic, and nothing but the truth. And if we’ve just made a mistake, most likely this is the moment when we feel ashamed. We look at what we’ve just done again and again and we simply can’t comprehend how something so stupid could be so easily done.
What’s the next usual step you take? Honestly now? Most of us will try and cover the tracks. We’ll pretend we didn’t notice something, or we’ll make it look like we don’t feel so good and we can’t possibly be held responsible for whatever just happened. Sometimes we won’t even bother with inventing or showing anything, we’ll just try running and hiding away. And we succeed at this, too! So quite often after doing something, it is really only ourselves who know what really happened and have the power to explain or fix the things done. But we very rarely do.
Why? Because that’s the human nature. We always have this fear. The fear of showing our real self, the fear of being exposed, the fear of being rejected for what we really are. This is because on top of our true selves, we’ve always got some layers of our personality – and as we go through our lives, these layers just keep adding up unless we do something about them.
Layers of personality and your personal growth
I personally don’t think it’s very important to know how many layers your personality has. As long as you’re conscious about having SOME layers, you’re fine. This means there is still hope that you can try and lift these layers, slowly and carefully peel them off and see (and maybe even show, if you’re adventurous enough) your true self.
You see, your true self is always right about everything. But our personality layers make us hide this truth, disguise it and then explain why we did it in such a way that we can live with it.
For instance, if you’re at work and you’ve got some task on your to-do list which you hate even thinking about, you’ll definitely try reasoning with yourself and explaining why it is very important that today you’re busy doing something quite different. Anything, in fact, except this one task you hate thinking about. It takes some training to finally find the courage to accept and explain things the way they really are. To absolutely agree with your true self and to accept what your course of actions should be.
We all have layers of personality for various reasons. Not all the layers serve the only purpose of making you look better in someone else’s eyes. Sometimes you need these layers to feel (to appear) less vulnerable to others. Quite often people add negative layers simply to hide how really weak or fragile they are. But it’s important to stay conscious about having few sides to your personality, and even more important to learn how to skip some of these layers and avoid their demonstration. You will make a great progress in your self-growth as soon as you master dealing with your personality layers. You don’t want to be hiding them. Instead, you should probably make it one of your personal development goals to ensure you take a closer look at every side of this personality of yours, and to analyze how much of a benefit it is to maintain or cultivate it, and to decide what parts of your personality are better for you to show and to hide.
Rediscover yourself
You can still probably remember the times where you could speak or act freely, without any fears regarding the impact your behaviour may have. Do you remember how good you felt back then? And can you spot what exactly have changed since then?
While I’m sure you have your reasons for changing over the past years, not all the changes you’ve gone through were really that necessary. And luckily for you, there is still time to revert some of these changes. And here are just a few steps which will help you rediscover yourself:
• Listen to your heart
You still get these moments in your life where you face some difficult situation and you even when you see the next logical step to the resolution, there is some resistance which makes you stop and think more before taking the action. I’m talking about the moments where your true self suggests you should do something, yet you know you can’t do just that due to some reasons imposed by the environment or the situation you’re in. A good example of this is any difficult argument with your better half or a true friend, especially when somewhere deep inside you know and you feel you’re not right.
How many times did you have to force yourself into such an argument and you couldn’t let yourself get out of this simply because you were thinking that if you give in, this would show you’re a weak person? There are many other reasons of the same kind, and if you actually take some time and go through them after the argument, many of them would make no sense whatsoever. They seemed to be important to you at the time of an argument, but they’re suddenly not anymore. This is exactly the situation I’m talking about.
When your heart tells you to stop arguing because what your opponent feels is much more important to you that what this person thinks, trust your feelings and stop. You’ll be amazed how many times such an act of yours will be greatly appreciated by the person you were arguing with.
• Focus on giving value
No matter what you’re working on, focus on giving value, and not on what impression you’re going to make. There are many prejudiced people around – no matter what you do, they will not change their opinion about you. As long as they have the slightest suspicion you’re doing something for you, and not for them, they’re not going to change their point of view.But what if you could just forget about the impression? Forget about people who might find your questions or actions silly. Focus on the value you’re going to give my taking some actions. Focus on the people who will benefit from your actions, and how exactly they’re going to appreciate the value.
This is true for many aspects of our life. If you forget about yourself, and concentrate on giving value to others, you’re bound to improve their attitude. People like getting value, and they appreciate it even if they don’t openly tell you.
• Maintain your integrity
There are many situations when doing something conflicts with your inner feelings or thoughts. Get into the habit of analyzing such situations.Quite often we conflict with our principles for the sake of looking good or making some progress. That’s why it is very important to always make sure you know if such a sacrifice is really necessary. If it’s something not important, you should never conflict with yourself, because in many situations you’re acting in a certain way simply because of the situation you’re in. What happens then is that the situation will change, while you will be left on your own with your thoughts and conflicts.
Maintain your integrity – many problems are not worth the self-conflicts you’re getting into.
• Respect your goals and values
This is probably the most important aspect of staying in peace with yourself. If you don’t respect what’s important for you in long term, you’re putting yourself under a risk of becoming a slave to other situations and people who will manipulate you.Yes, it’s always good for you to give value to others, but you should avoid doing it at your own goals and values expense. If you know that helping someone else make things worse from your own goals and values point of view, take some time and reconsider.
In many cases, the little value you’re going to force yourself give to someone else will not be worth the personal goals of yours which you may not meet as the result.
That’s it for now. These are the principles I live by, and they really help me feel better about myself. Thanks to my better knowledge of my own personality, it’s easier for me to achieve my personal development goals and to progress with my self-growth. Now that you know these principles, please consider applying this knowledge in your personal growth and telling me what your principles are. I’m always interested to learn, so if you have time to post a comment or even simply share a useful link – please do so. Thanks!

AThe butterfly slumbers in its cocoon.
An uninspiring shape seemingly trapped within its own environment.
But its nature is to be free... and when the right time comes its shackles are removed and it rises in its glorious colors to achieve its purpose in the wheel of life.
Many times we might wonder what we are called upon to do. What our Mission in life requires of us.
Such thoughts reflect the pain and glory that cloaks humanity. The pain of struggling with such existential questions and the glory of being aware that we are not just a whiff of shapeless smoke that dissolves itself into nonexistence. We have the ability to make a difference and impact in life- and if we realize our full potential we can live peak moments of meaningful fulfillment.
However the journey to self-realization and mastery is not an easy one.
It is troubled by the waves of constant demands that life imposes upon us as we strive to carry out our individual responsibilities. Daily struggles with routine that threaten to slowly erode the individual traits and inner essence that seeks to be manifested into reality.
It is only when we stop and take time to be present with our inner self that the miracle of a Purposeful life manifests itself. A Life on Purpose that reflects the essence of who we are and why we are here. A journey that starts with a focused evaluation of our core Values. An intuitive voice that whispers which direction we need to take.
Without this inner journey and the conquest of self-mastery the real meaning of life will continue to elude us. As Buddha said:
It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.
But is the journey within self an easy one? Do we have the means to clarify our Life purpose in world that demands our constant attention?
If we could say that such a journey is easy we would be living in delusion.
But one thing is certain.
If you focus your mind on starting the journey, the guide to coach you along the way will appear at the right moment. Life has a way of providing opportunities for those who seek and as Jesus said:
Ask, and what you ask for shall be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and the door shall be opened to you.
The quest for Purpose thus requires a Decision on our part to start the process. To ask and seek guidance. To delve deeply within our inner being and follow the clues which are imprinted subtly along the pathway of our life.
Clues that can astonishingly change our direction of life and create new passion and zest. A shift in perception and awareness that will have us wondering at the beauty and synchronicity that permeates life.
The way to self-fulfillment and meaning is an exciting treasure hunt that requires us to answer certain questions:
What is the one thing that has always attracted me and given me a sense of meaning?
Who do I admire and what qualities do I admire in such people?
What are my core Values that influence my decisions in life?
What have I always liked to do?
It is through such a journey of self-reflection that we can realize ourselves and achieve our purpose. It is the Decision to raise our Personal Standards and to refuse anything less than to live our Dream that can shift our mind into a state of resourcefulness that will give us a compelling life.
Let's stretch ourselves from our self-imposed cocoon, spread our wings and fly.

Integrity Quotes

Integrity Definition
1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10

A building has integrity just like a man. And just as seldom.
Ayn Rand

A life lived with integrity - even if it lacks the trappings of fame and fortune is a shinning star in whose light others may follow in the years to come.
Denis Waitley

A mode of conduct, a standard of courage, discipline, fortitude and integrity can do a great deal to make a woman beautiful.
Jacqueline Bisset

A single lie destroys a whole reputation of integrity.
Baltasar Gracian

A task becomes a duty from the moment you suspect it to be an essential part of that integrity which alone entitles a man to assume responsibility.
Dag Hammarskjold

A thing is right when it tends to preserve the integrity, stability and beauty of the biotic community. It is wrong when it tends otherwise.
Aldo Leopold

Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life, and that happiness, not pain or mindless self-indulgence, is the proof of your moral integrity, since it is the proof and the result of your loyalty to the achievement of your values.
Ayn Rand

Actors say they do their own stunts for the integrity of the film but I did them because they looked like a lot of fun.
Steve Coogan

All musicians start out with ideals but hanging on to them in the face of media scrutiny takes real integrity. Tougher still is to live up to the ideals of your dedicated fans.
Billy Bragg

Americans are rightly concerned about the security and the integrity of the nation's borders because the system is broken. Some are concerned about the possibility of terrorists crossing our borders and coming into our cities.
Chris Cannon

And it is no less true, that personal security and private property rest entirely upon the wisdom, the stability, and the integrity of the courts of justice.
Joseph Story

Anything that harms the integrity of the game is terrible. We always thought we were immune to drugs in baseball, but we know that's not true anymore.
Harmon Killebrew

Arguments of convenience lack integrity and inevitably trip you up.
Donald Rumsfeld

As a cop, I dealt with every kind of bum and criminal. They all have more integrity than some Hollywood people.
Joseph Wambaugh

Attend with Diligence and strict Integrity to the Interest of your Correspondents and enter into no Engagements which you have not the almost certain Means of performing.
George Mason

Attending that Convention and talking with those people and many others convinced me that I should become a blogger in my efforts to reform the government and uphold the integrity of the Constitution and the laws made in furtherance thereof.
John Jay Hooker

Be daring, be different, be impractical, be anything that will assert integrity of purpose and imaginative vision against the play-it-safers, the creatures of the commonplace, the slaves of the ordinary.
Cecil Beaton

Be Impeccable With Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
Miguel Angel Ruiz

Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well, but what you need today is Charm. Go ahead and work on your economic programs if you want to, I'll develop my radio personality.
Gracie Allen

But it must not be thought that I say this out of personal experience: for in the many years that I have been before the public my secret methods have been steadily shielded by the strict integrity of my assistants, most of whom have been with me for years.
Harry Houdini

Making your Romantic Dreams come True
Are you having the romantic life you have always wanted... in your imagination? Welcome to the club that has many members who feel and live exactly the way you do! Romance is always simple and carefree when it is being acted out in our imaginations.
How's Your Self-Awareness?
This issue was designed to help you to develop greater self-awareness. This critical knowledge will tell you who you really are and help you to accept and love your true self. Without this, you cannot set the goals that will bring about the life changes
what are you Passionate About?
Hopefully this issue will help you to jump-start your new season resolve to pursue your goals and dreams. As you settle into your fall routines; try to make time to identify your passions and grow them into a life that has true meaning, purpose

How to re-discover yourself

Have you reached a point in your life where you now look at yourself, yet do not recognize who you are? Do you feel like you have lost yourself, not looking the way you used to, or not acting and doing the things the way you used to do? Do not give up on yourself just yet! There are many reasons to why people let themselves go and you are not alone when it comes to this topic. In fact, the majority of people feel that they have lost themselves in one way or another. While this may be a fact, it is also a fact that you can re-discover yourself and find the person you feel you have lost.
Before you re-discover yourself, you must research and take notes on yourself, finding out what exactly it is you have lost about your persona. Is it the way you used to look? Or the activities you once took part of? No matter what it is, you must target what that thing or things are. Once you have accomplished that assignment, you should then turn your focus on what you believe is the cause of you partial loss of yourself. When did this "losing yourself" take place? Was it after you got involved in a relationship? After you got married? Perhaps after you started a new job somewhere? Learning about when and what caused you to let yourself go will play the main role in leading you to re-discovering yourself.
Acknowledging that there is something missing and what caused its disappearance is the biggest step, not to mention the most important. Without the acknowledgment, you would still be clueless! It is very common for people to replace their feelings of losing themselves with thoughts telling them that they did not lose themselves, but they just changed. Get in close touch with yourself and make sure you are clear about whether you really have changed, or if you are just in denial. Feel it is difficult to detect the difference? Do not give up!
If you unsure about it, do not give up, but just go back a few steps. Go back a few steps to the place where you pin pointed exactly what it is about you that you feel you lost. When you get there, ask yourself if the loss actually bothers you. If it is something you think about often, wishing that you could be that way again but cannot seem to get there, then you are definitely in need of re-discovery. If you feel that it is something you used to do, but is simply a past version of yourself, then you are fine and should just let it go and concentrate on moving on with your present life.
If you do wish to get back a part of yourself that you did lose, how can you get it back? Chances are you have probably attempted getting it back, but could not stick to it and ended up giving up and feeling worse about it. What you need to do is rate the importance of this and put it on your highest priority list. Make it a daily habit to report to yourself and see what you have done daily to take a step forward into gaining that part of you back. Keep a daily journal and write down your thoughts on it, what you plan to do about it, and how it goes. Be sure to also write down a reminder to yourself everyday about how much you wish to get this part of you back. Reminding yourself about on a constant note will help you gain the strength and confidence to push yourself harder to getting, because you believe more and more that you can do- and nothing will stop you.
The truth is, you never really "lost" yourself, you just neglected apart of you that is now demanding attention again. Throw all of your excuses out the window and start facing the facts in front of you. There is nothing or no one in this world who should drive you to neglect a part of yourself. You know that it takes balance and organization to maintain the other things in your life like relationships, work, friendships, family life and so on, so what makes you any different? If you want to continue being the person you always were, as well as adding new wonderful things to your personal being, then you need be organized. This means making time to invest attention and effort to all angles of your personal being and the things around you, as well as the people that share an important part of your life. By organizing your time, you will soon see how your life and views about yourself wonderfully get back into shape, and you will not only re-discover yourself, but discover a new side and strength that will open more opportunities for you!

How to discover yourself


In the middle of the journey of our life I came to myself within a dark wood where the straight way was lost.
Discover Who You Are...
Are you wondering how to discover yourself? Searching for a way to discover who you really are? Curious about what makes you unique and how to become the person you were meant to be?
People travel across the globe in search of themselves ... always with the same question on their minds...
How do I discover myself?
The answer may surprise you ... and it is not that difficult of a task.
Seven Sirius Steps
Seven steps help you find your way and discover yourself. I use them to help guide those who have lost their way or forgotten who they really are. If you have never have found an answer before, these seven steps may help.
Every step helps you discover something important and meaningful about who you are, what makes makes life magical and meaningful, and why you are here.

Step 0. Start Journey of Self Discovery
The first step is to start off on a journey to discover yourself and who you are meant to become. Along the way you will learn how to know yourself and begin answering the Big Questions of Life. Come learn what inspires you ...
Read more ...


Step 1. Find Your Life path
The next step is to explore and identify your life path. Each person has their own unique path, a personal way of combining one or several of the nine life activities found throughout the universe.
Read more ...



Step 2. Find Your Bliss
What you love reflects your bliss, so reconnect with what you love to rediscover the recipe for your bliss. By learning about the seven ingredients, you can start to write your own personal recipe for bliss.
Learn more ...




Step 3. Discover Your Life Way
What you value and care deeply about reflects your life way. Explore the 28 universal ways to discover your own which describes the ideas that shape your world view and define your personal experience of life.
Read More ...



Step 4. Discover Your Life Calling
Now it is time to tune in and listen for your life calling, and discover what you are meant to do, be, give and become.
Read More ...




Step 5. Discover Your Life Purpose
Hand in hand with your life calling is the discovery of your life purpose -- why you are here and what you are supposed to experience, learn and get out of this lifetime.
Learn more ...

Step 6. Describe Living Your Dreams
Next, it is time to pull everything you have discovered together and describe the life you want to live. Using all the ideas about what inspires you and makes you unique, an authentic life story emerges ... based on knowing who you want to become.
Read more . . .



Step 7. Make Your Dreams Come True
With all this knowledge, you can now focus on learning how to start making your dreams come true. it is time to begin living the life you dream of .... the time is ripe to plant the seeds for a new life.
Learn more ...


Ready to start? If so, let's move forward. And for those of you who want some help, the Wise Woman is here to help you succeed.

Finding yourself is an enlightening experience. You become self-sufficient and do things for others without expectations of something in return. You are no longer needy and become utterly grateful for all the things people have done for you in the past. Finding yourself is a time of harmony because you develop that philosophy or belief system that will carry you throughout the rest of your life. When you love yourself and who you are, you will savor and enjoy both life's pain and pleasures. How do you know you have found yourself? When you are able to help others find themselves. Finding yourself is not easy. If you have never felt connected to whom you are, and you want to find whatever makes you, being yourself will be hard. The first step is always the hardest, but after that hill, you will be smooth sailing to discovering who you are.

Steps

• Create your life timeline"'. Write down all of the major events in your life that you feel have affected you and have made you who you are. Try to re-experience these events from a different perspective and take the lessons that you need from it. Don't dwell on negative experiences but realize that if it had not been for those past experiences you would not be where or who you are today.

•
Start with a clean slate'. Develop your own moral conduct and practice sticking to it. Remove vice from your life. Smoking, over-eating, and over-drinking will prevent you from functioning at your peak. This may take some major rehabilitation for some individuals. Remember, you can't drive your life forward if you are always gazing through your rear-view mirror!
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Now that you have a clean slate and you realize some people still think you stink: Forget about what everyone else thinks! You cannot please everyone. While you might not want to disappoint the people close to you, they should want you to be happy. As long as you continue to exist to fulfill other people's ideas of who you should be, you'll never know your true talents. "He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away." - Raymond Hull
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'Find solitude'. Get away from the expectations, the conversations, the noise, the media, and the pressure. Take some time each day to go for a long walk and think. Plant yourself on a park bench and look. Take a long, thoughtful road trip. Whatever you do, move away from anything that distracts you from contemplating your life and where you want it to go. In solitude, you should feel independent and self-sufficient, not lonely, needy or afraid.
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Ask yourself every question in the book, questions that are difficult, that dare to look at the big pictures, such as:
• If I had all the resources in the world - if I didn't need to make money - what would I be doing with my day to day life and why? Perhaps you'd be painting, or writing, or farming, or exploring the Amazon rain forest. Don't hold back.
• What do I want to look back on in my life and say that I never regretted? Would you regret never having traveled abroad? Would you regret never having asked that person out, even if it meant risking rejection? Would you regret not spending enough time with your family when you could? This question can be particularly difficult for some people.
• If you had to choose three words to describe the kind of person you'd love to be, what would those words be? Adventurous? Loving? Open? Honest? Hilarious? Optimistic? Realistic? Motivated? Resilient? Don't be afraid to pick up a thesaurus. Don't be afraid to choose words that are considered negative. Sometimes your traits that others don't like become useful only in emergency situations or are valuable to the job you are meant to perform. If you do have a truly negative trait works on redirecting that energy to something positive. Exercising compensates for many bad habits and there are hobbies for almost every vice. Pole dancing is becoming a hobby! Don't wash your clothes much? Try camping. Maybe you'll like it?
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Write down your answers. Beyond your time alone, it's easy for these thoughts to slip to the back of your mind and be forgotten. If you have them written down, then every time you reflect, you can review your notes and take it a step further, instead of answering the same questions all over again.
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Act upon your newly discovered knowledge. Do the things that you want to do! Pick up those water-colors. Write a short story. Plan a trip to Mombassa, Mt Kenya, a walk at Nairobi Safari Walk. Have dinner with a family member. Start cracking jokes Open up. Tell the truth. Whatever it is that you've decided you want to be or do, start doing it now.
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Be ready for dead ends. Finding yourself is a journey, not a destination. A lot of it is trial and error. That's the price you pay in return for the satisfaction you receive: More often than not, you hit a bump in the road, and sometimes you fall flat on your face. Be prepared to understand and accept that this is a part of the process, and commit to getting right back up and starting over. It's not going to be easy - it never has been for anybody - but if you learn to see that as a chance to prove how much you want to find yourself, then you'll find fulfillment and security in your pursuit. When you are yourself, everyone will respect you more a. Best of all, you will always feel good about yourself. nd treat you kindly

Integrity is not something we are born with, nor can we go out to buy it. It does not come in a box with a pretty little bow. It would be nice if it were so easy, but it’s not. Integrity is something you have to grow from within. For me personally, it wasn’t until I got older and had lived life for a while that all the pieces came together.



First, I learned the value of my word and honesty. And then from experience I slowly began building my moral compass. I developed a sense of what’s right and wrong. I began to figure out what my ethics and morals are. Only once I realized I had these values, I really began to live them and use them as my moral compass.

Integrity has been defined as “Moral soundness; honesty; freedom from corrupting influence or motive” by a good friend of mine and college graduate. The dictionary describes it as “Unimpaired, unadulterated, or genuine state; entire correspondence with an original condition; purity.” I enjoy Peter’s definition more then the official definition, however, the “genuine state” part of the dictionary definition is also really good. The moral standards of most societies, according to Mr. Lewis, coincide to a remarkable degree.

By ignoring our consciences, dispensing with guilt, and ignoring honor, we are blissfully indifferent to the societal decay that has crept around us. In a spirit of false enlightenment we have looked the other way as families, friendships, and even lives have been sacrificed on the altar of self-interest and doing what "feels good." Instead of affirming these people for achieving self-actualization, we ought to shake our heads and wonder what could cause someone to so abandon their senses.

So, what is integrity? Really, it’s about behaving in a way that you are proud of. It means that your morals are intact & that you don’t bend them on a whim.